Omegle

You: 5. Male. England.
Stranger: 5?
You: Yes. Got a problem with that?
Stranger: yeah. namely, i’m not a rapist. so
You: So what? I’d probably consent.
Stranger: so it’d be consensual rape. that’s still jailtime
You: Why would it be rape?
Stranger: because you are five and i am an adult. if i boned you, it’d be unright.
You: Is it against the law to have sex with someone with a small penis?
Stranger: when it’s a five year old, yes.
You: I think you misunderstand. I’m 5 inches.
Stranger: oh, i see. well i definitely understand now.
Stranger: ;)
You: Are you gay?
Stranger: i’m a straight girl.
You: How old are you?
Stranger: 36
You: You are more a woman than a girl.
Stranger: okay dick. i still got the tits and the pussy.
You: I’m not complaining.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: I am a gay potatoes.
Stranger: i am a gay carrot!
You: What?
Stranger: i know right
You: You seem interesting. Do you want to have sex with me?
Stranger: well im not a gay potato, this could be difficult
You: I’m not really a gay potatoes.
Stranger: oh wow, you dodged a bullet there man, its not fun
Stranger: however, are you a wizard>
You: I’m not/
Stranger: oh ok
Stranger: are you a dude or what
You: I may not be a wizard, but I sure can jizz hard. Does that answer your question?
Stranger: jizz in your pants or in the air like you just don;t care/
You: On my stomach.
Stranger: oh gross. i find that its quite a forceful orgasm and so i get it on my face
You: What are you wearing?
Stranger: im wearing a strap on that;s not fake
Stranger: in other words im a dude
Stranger: and a troll
You: Are you trolling now?
Stranger: what do you do when confronted by a troll?
You: Get a bigger goat.
Stranger: ok, in all seriousness. can i ask you something?
You: No.
Stranger: Fucking magnets dude…how do they work?
You: The power of Christ compels them.
Stranger: so jesus is a wizard?
You: Wizards and Jesus are made-up.
Stranger: ok, im outta here. gotta go fuck my hand
You: Bye.
Stranger: have a good one
Stranger: walk with the earthmother
You: Blessing of Akatosh upon ye.
Stranger: may the eternal sun shine upon you
You: Piss off, then.
Stranger: :)
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You:
I don’t want to sounds like a weirdo or anything, but can I fist your arsehole until I can see your intestines and my hand is covered in shit while you piss on me?
Stranger: have you seen catfish?
You: Yes.
Stranger: what a film hey
You: I have not seen a film by that name.
Stranger: oh………..
Stranger: why did you lie then?
You: From where I come, we start titles with capital letters.
Stranger: Touch

You: What colour underwear are you wearing?
Stranger: SONIC THE HEDGEHOG COLOURED.
Stranger: It’s like a mixture of all loads of colours.
Stranger: blue, mainly.
You: Niiiiice. Do you like Sonic?
Stranger: I supoose I must, having underwear with his face printed on them.
Stranger: suppose*
You: How old are you?
Stranger: Some days over 15 years, sir/madam. (Which is it to be?(
Stranger: )*
You: I am male.
Stranger: Great Thunderflies, really?!
You: I’m fairly sure of it.
Stranger: Excellent.
You: Which are you?
Stranger: Male also.
You: Are you gay?
Stranger: No.
Stranger: Are you?
You: Yes. Do you want to have e-sex with me?
Stranger: I said I am NOT gay.
Stranger: Homosexuality is not a cause for dyslexia.
You: It obvouisly isn’t. Does my sexy face not tempt you, little boy? http://img64.imageshack.us/img64/904/dreamboat.jpg
Stranger: I didn’t even look at that.
You: Why not, faggot?
Stranger: You’re wasting your OBVIOUSLY valuable time here, move on.
Stranger: I am NOT GAY.
Stranger: Get it into your homosexual skull.
You: Are you being homophobic?
Stranger: No.
Stranger: Just bitchy. :)
You: Do you want to be my bitch?
Stranger: No.
Stranger: I don;t have a shower, a prison, and I’m NOT GAY>
Stranger: >:(
You: Please send me nudes of you. Don’t be homophobic or I’ll tell your teachers and you’ll get in trouble.
Stranger: You don’t know my teachers.
You: I can find out. Any pictures?
Stranger: NO.
You: What colour is the back of your sonic underwear?
Stranger: YO MOMMA.
You: Take them off and check for me, my little boysex.
Stranger: Begone with you.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Very proud of this one:
You: Hello.
Stranger: howdy
You: From where are you?
Stranger: canada
You: What state’s that in?
Stranger: state?
Stranger: canadas a country
Stranger: do you live under a rock
Stranger: ?
You: No. It isn’t a country.
Stranger: yes it is
Stranger: in northamerica
You: You are wrong. You are an idiot.
Stranger: ontop of the usa
Stranger: yup your right
Stranger: im wrong
You: Yes. Good. How old are you?
Stranger: 17
You: 17 is not a number.
Stranger: you have issues
You: Are you male or female?
Stranger: none of your business
You: As a sexist, I feel it is entirely my business.
Stranger: well your wrong
You: I am guessing you are female. What brings you to Omegle?
Stranger: wrong
Stranger: your not a very good sexist
You: I just figured from the way you were acting.
Stranger: and you dont no what canada is.
Stranger: and 17 is a number
You: You are such a fool. I know what Canada is, and 17 is not on the list. The list goes 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 18, 19, 20. See. It is not on the list.
Stranger: your list is wrong
Stranger: and canadas a country
Stranger: so obviously you dont know what it is
You: Arguing with you is like arguing with a child or woman. Just accept you don’t know anything.
Stranger: what makes you think your above me
Stranger: is it just how your brain works
You: I am above you because you don’t understand simple facts.
Stranger: you don’t come on here, refuse to beilive about a country. which happens to be on a world map
You: I do.
Stranger: according to whoever made the number system 17 is a number
You: Is rghsr a number? No. 17 is not a number.
Stranger: why not
You: Because you can’t just string together two or more digits and expect to make a number.
Stranger: that is what 10-99 is
Stranger: so those numbers dont exist either right
You: They exist, obviously, you idiot.
Stranger: oh usa isnt a country either
Stranger: how old are you
You: I am 17 years young.
Stranger: no your not
You: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States
Stranger: wikipedia isnt reliable
Stranger: anybody can go on and change the information on it you idiot
Stranger: your like talking to a child or a women god
Stranger: .
You: It is the most reliable site on the ‘Net. You are a woman and a child.
You: Are you still there or are you sulking?
Stranger: im not sulking
You: You should be.
Stranger: im puting my priorities first
Stranger: i spelt that wrong…
You: Doing your make-up, are you?
Stranger: and no it is not reliable
You: Coming from someone who thinks 17 is a number.
Stranger: why would i be doing my make up
You: You are a woman.
Stranger: yup
Stranger: good job
Stranger: still, why would i be doing my makeup
You: Because you are otherwise ugly.
Stranger: no im not
You: You look like an ape.
You: Probably.
Stranger: i hardly wear makeup in the first place so i guess i always look like an ape
You: An ugly ape like in the zoo freak show.
Stranger: you know what i find funny about people like you?
You: The jokes?
Stranger: you sit behind a computer screen.
You: In front of the screen.
You: So I can see it.
Stranger: nope behind
Stranger: you hide behind it to be more exacted
You: OK…
Stranger: if you talked like this to someone in real life you’d probably get punched in the face
You: Not by a woman, though.
Stranger: nope
Stranger: a woman is capable of punching you
You: Not hard, though. All women are weaker than all men.
Stranger: in some ways yes
Stranger: but not all ways
Stranger: women have a higher pain tollerance then men
Stranger: making us stronger then men in that situation
You: I’ll just have to hit your lot harder, then.
Stranger: go ahead and try
Stranger: OH WAIT!
Stranger: you cant
Stranger: because your not here
Stranger: your behind your computer screen
Stranger: and since canada isnt a country
Stranger: then it isnt on a map
Stranger: SO YOU WONT BE ABLE TO FIND ME
You: It’s on a map. It’s a town, probably.
Stranger: you did not think your plan out very clearly
You: I’ll just have to stick to annoying you, then.
Stranger: your not annoying me
You: I definitely am.
Stranger: no
Stranger: your really not
Stranger: i would of disconnected if you were annoying me
You: I just thought because you were spelling words wrong and everything…
Stranger: im a very bad speller all the time
Stranger: i have troubles with grammer
You: I can’t hold it against you, woman.
Stranger: do you have something against woman?
Stranger: just wondering
Stranger: you wouldnt be here if because of them
You: No. I love them as sex objects and baby-bearers. That is all.
Stranger: you have a nice outlook on life
Stranger: where are you from
Stranger: india? asia?
You: Canada.
You: Sorry, I mean England.
Stranger: no you are not
You: I don’t know, then.
Stranger: first of all canadians arent this rude
Stranger: so you are not from canada
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: Hey
You: Male or inferior?
Stranger: Male
Stranger: xD
You: Are you gay?
Stranger: No, are you?
You: No. Do you want to have sex?
Stranger: Uhmm… what kind of question is that?
Stranger: o.o
You: A simple question.
Stranger: What purpose does it serve?
You: Procreation is the main purpose. You should know that by now.
Stranger: Well i know that, dear sir.
You: I don’t believe you. You seem ignorant.
Stranger: And you seem to try too hard to sound intelligent.
You: I am intelligenter than you.
Stranger: Nuh uhhh
You: Uh huh.
Stranger: This is not very fun.
Stranger: You’re bad at arguing :/
You: And you are gay.
Stranger: Nope, i love women :)
You: Women who look like men because you are gay.
Stranger: Good comeback.
Stranger: You’re… I’m assuming here.. 14? 15?
You: You like cum on your back because you are gay. I am 17.
Stranger: Maybe 16 years old at most?
Stranger: Well then, that’s surprising.
You: How old are you, gay?
Stranger: I’m 23, thanks.
You: How old is your boyfriend?
Stranger: He’s 22.
You: Proof you are gay.
Stranger: Yup.
Stranger: I love it in the B-Hole.
You: You are sick.
Stranger: Thanks ;)
You: What are you wearing?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: Guy looking for another guy to show him pics of my ex girlfriends and how we’d bang them (: good man talk
You: I am gay.
Stranger: Cool :P
You: Not really. My ex did look like a boy, though. http://img64.imageshack.us/img64/904/dreamboat.jpg
Stranger: Pfft that’s cutting it close man
You: Would you do her?
Stranger: Yeah ;)
You: I did, and it was great.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: 17. Male. England.
Stranger: 19 m US
You: Gay?
Stranger: bi
You: Bye.
Stranger: u?
Stranger: ok
You: Straight.
Stranger: ok then.
Stranger: so whats up?
You: My cock as I think about you.
Stranger: im confused didnt u just say u were straight?
You: No.
Stranger: okie dokie then.
You: What brings a stud like you to Omegle?
Stranger: boredom.
Stranger: u?
Stranger: XD
You: I am a male looking for horny girls to cyber with.
You: Sorry, im a male looking for horny girls to cyber with
Stranger: well ur out of luck dude, im a guy.
You: I don’t mind. I’m not homophobic.
Stranger: ok neither am i..
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Phone call.
Stranger: 17 f usa and not horny
Stranger: HELLO?
You: Hello.
Stranger: I answered the phone call
You: What are you wearing?
Stranger: Clothes
You: Sexy clothes?
Stranger: Oh yeah, sexy sweatpants.
You: Am I sexy? http://img263.imageshack.us/img263/7438/meagain2.jpg
Stranger: Did you just send me a virus?
Stranger: Uh….
You: My face isn’t that bad that it breaks your computer. It’s called a link.
Stranger: >:)
Stranger: I know what the hell a link is.
You: Imageshack are an image hosting company. Not a virus distribution centre.
Stranger: It’s called a joke.
Stranger: Apparently a bad one.
Stranger: You can chill out now, kthanks.
You: No. I won’t chill out. I am angry.
Stranger: And why?
You: Because you don’t love me.
Stranger: Oh, honeybunch. I love you plenty.
You: Thanks. Your are my perfect woman. i.e. you are female.
Stranger: Wonderful. My life is complete.
You: You don’t seem to be acting very horny.
Stranger: I said I wasn’t.
Stranger: Can’t you read?
You: I skim read. I am a busy man with lots to do.
Stranger: Oh?
Stranger: Obviously too busy for me
Stranger: Fine, I get it. Go to your other woman.
You: I’ll make time for you, you bed bucket.
Stranger: You better, you strumpet.
You: What brings you to Omegle?
Stranger: Hopes of stumbling upon an interesting conversation.
Stranger: Like this one.
You: My interests include tying and untying my shoelaces and cataloguing the lengths of my shoelaces.
Stranger: Do you also collect different colored and sized aglets?
You: If aglets are the stuff I find in my belly button, then yes.
Stranger: That’s belly button lint. But..gross.
Stranger: NO, aglets are the plastic pieces at the ends of your shoelaces.
You: I looked it up just now. It seemed cheating to look it up before answering.
Stranger: Cheater.
Stranger: Cheater.
Stranger: Pumpkin Eater.
You: Are you calling me gay?
Stranger: Perhaps.
You: I’m not. Can we have sex to prove I’m not gay?
Stranger: Nope, I don’t do homos
Stranger: My suspicions soon become facts.
You: Curse you God for making me this way.
Stranger: Bummer.
You: I’m not.
Stranger: Whatever makes you feel better.
You: Taking off my gloves helps me feel better.
Stranger: Then go for it
You: I would have appreciated some sort of laugh or evidence of laughter. Let’s try again. Taking off my gloves helps me feel better.
Stranger: Har
Stranger: Har
Stranger: Hardy har har
You: Thanks.
Stranger: You’re welcome.
You: Where do you live?
Stranger: In a house.
You: What is the address?
Stranger: Creep, much?
You: I’m gay according to you so you are safe. Where do you live?
Stranger: So? Gay guys can still be dangerous.
Stranger: In the United States, friend.
You: Not dangerous to pretty little things like you.
Stranger: How…
Stranger: do you know that I’m pretty.
You: I have a hard-on right now so you must be pretty.
Stranger: Lies.
You: I’ve got a semi.
Stranger: lol, I’m hot.
You: Niiiiice. Do you want me to masturbate on camera for you? I’ll do it if it will make you happy.
Stranger: Uh, hell no.
You: Okay, lesbian.
Stranger: It’s all good. You’re gay and I’m a lesbian.
Stranger: Works out.
You: Does that mean we can get together because it is a double negative?
Stranger: Nope. You’ve turned me off.
You: Is it my persistent perversity? That turns a lot of girls off.
Stranger: Yes, yes it is.
Stranger: And how old are you?
You: Take a guess, babe.
Stranger: No, I asked you. Which implies that I was looking for an answer.
You: I thought we could make a game of it. Look at my picture, if you would so care, and guess.
Stranger: 25.
You: A good number, but no. Have you seen the picture?
Stranger: Yes…I have.
Stranger: That’s why I gave you that answer.
Stranger: Higher or lower?
You: Lower.
Stranger: 24.
You: Lower.
Stranger: 23
Stranger: Fun game.
You: Lower, you filty whore. Guessing games turn me on so much.
Stranger: Filthy whore?
Stranger: Oh fuck you.
You: Sorry. I got a bit carried away, but I’ve cum now so we should be fine. I’m 17.
Stranger: You’re serious?
Stranger: 17?
You: Yep.
Stranger: Or are you just saying that because I’m 17.
You: I genuinely am 17.
Stranger: Interesting
Stranger: Actually no. It’s not
You: What do you like? Do you look like me?
Stranger: Your perversity seems to fit your age.
Stranger: I look like a girl.
Stranger: No, I don’t look anything like you.
You: Would you kill yourself if you did?
Stranger: Probably.
You: Thanks. I’ll bear that in mind.
Stranger: Goody.
You: Bill Oddy?
Stranger: Strange, your proper grammer and decent sentence structure doesn’t seem to fit your age.
Stranger: And no, not Bill Oddy.
You: My grammar isn’t even proper in most places.
Stranger: Eh, proper enough for me.
Stranger: Enough for me to not have disconnected yet.
You: lol thnks
Stranger: Darn.
Stranger: Fail
Stranger: There goes your proper grammer streak…..
Stranger: :O
You: It doesn’t count because it’s satire.
Stranger: Or rather, sarcasm?
You: Satire makes me sound like a real comedian, though. Like Rory Bremner or someone.
Stranger: Lol.
Stranger: Okay, whatever makes you sound like a real “comedian”
Stranger: But let me crush your dreams right now. You’re not funny
You: Maybe not to a girl. Maybe not to an American. Maybe not to you, but Rob Crane might like this bit. He’ll also like that I mentioned him. Hello, Ron.
Stranger: Are you not an American?
You: Colour.
Stranger: Pardon?
Stranger: British?
You: Yes.
Stranger: Ah..clever. You spelled out a word.
Stranger: I’m not an American either.
Stranger: Just living among them.
You: What are you?
Stranger: Ha. Indian
Stranger: Go ahead. Disconnect.
You: Is that like someone from India or something?
Stranger: Like, yeah. Where else.
You: Pakistan? Bangladesh? They’re all essentially China, anyway.
Stranger: I’m from India.
Stranger: Clarified enough?
You: Thanks.
Stranger: If I were from Pakistan, I’d say Pakistani
Stranger: If I were from Bangladesh, I’d be Bangladeshi
Stranger: China? Chinese.
Stranger: Japan? Japanese.
Stranger: Australia? Australian.
Stranger: Get it now?
You: Please continue. I think I almost understand.
Stranger: Har
You: What do you do for fun?
Stranger: Hmm
Stranger: You want to get to know me?
You: I love you.
You: These words are my own, from my heartflow.
Stranger: Why is your heart flowing these words..
You: I have cardiovicrania. Words from my brain end up in my heart. My heart also leaks.
Stranger: Made up a word to impress me, I see.
You: It was to add validity to my obviously false story.
Stranger: Obvi.
Stranger: You don’t love me. Don’t feed me empty words.
You: What should I feed you? Do you like mangos?
Stranger: How’d you know?
You: Everyone like mangos.
Stranger: Very true.
You: What time is it there?
Stranger: 3:40 pm.
Stranger: and it’s 8:40 pm there.
Stranger: More or less
You: Pretty AND clever.
Stranger: Quite.
You: Do you want to see a picture of me where I look like a rapist?
Stranger: Oh yes. Because chicks dig rapists.
You: I’ve given up trying to impress you since I found out you were female. http://img843.imageshack.us/img843/8744/epar.png
Stranger: LOL
Stranger: That’s nice.
You: Thanks. Would you?
Stranger: Would I what?
You: You know what I mean.
Stranger: Nope.
Stranger: What do you mean.
You: Hy-pathetic sex?
Stranger: *Hypothetic
Stranger: No.
You: Oh.
Stranger: Yes. I just corrected you.
Stranger: Buuurn.
You: I did it on purpose, but didn’t want to embarrass you by correcting you. You spelled “grammar” wrong.
Stranger: Well done, Sir Stranger.
You: “Buuum.”
Stranger: I spelled B U R N
Stranger: You just called me a bum.
You: Sorry. I like bums.
Stranger: Sorry to disappoint.
Stranger: I’m too hot to be a bum.
You: Do you mean you could turn to prostitution if you ever became homeless?
Stranger: I’d rather just accept my situation and let Death claim me.
You: I wouldn’t mined claiming you.
Stranger: I wouldn’t allow you to claim me.
You: I’d overpower you and claim you hard.
Stranger: Oh no..no you wouldn’t.
You: Why not? Are you really fat or actually a man?
Stranger: Neither
Stranger: I’m who I said I am.
You: I could beat you in a fight because I am a hard man.
Stranger: You sexist.
Stranger: Then, who will make you your sandwich?
You: Mum.
Stranger: And she’ll refuse.
You: Then I’ll do it myself, but without spread or butter because I can’t be arsed.
Stranger: Good for you.
Stranger: Well, my time has arrived to bid you adieu.
Stranger: Adieu.
You: A jew.
Stranger: :|
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Male?
Stranger: Female
You: Oh.
Stranger: Yeah
You: Do you like electronic music?
Stranger: Kinda sorta
You: I’ll take that as a no.
Stranger: I like some of it
You: Stuff with lyrics?
Stranger: Yes
You: Thought so.
Stranger: Well then
You: How old are you?
Stranger: 64
You: Like the NIntendo?
Stranger: Yes?
You: From where are you?
Stranger: Mars
You: Like the Nintendo?
Stranger: Nintendo isn’t from Mars!
You: Oh yes. Do you want to see a picture of me?
Stranger: Yes
You: http://img263.imageshack.us/img263/7438/meagain2.jpg Hahahaha
Stranger: I’d tap dat.
You: Don’t take the piss.
Stranger: But wai?
You: It is mean.
Stranger: I don’t have pants on
You: And?
Stranger: That’s it
You: Why are you on Omegle?
Stranger: Because I can be
You: That is a bad reason.
Stranger: Ya know what else is bad?
You: My face?
Stranger: No
You: Yes. What else?
Stranger: China
You: You got beef with China?
Stranger: Nah. They make good food
You: Are you really 64?
Stranger: Fuck no
You: So you lied to me? I am very disappointed in you.
Stranger: I’m sorry
You: I’ll let you live.
Stranger: YAY
You: How old are you really?
Stranger: 20
You: I may as well believe you.
Stranger: Why would I lie?
You: You have a past of lying.
Stranger: Oh do I?
You: Yes. I’m starting to doubt whether or not you’re from Mars either.
Stranger: I am too. Mars is in Oklahoma
You: OK…
You: lahoma
Stranger: XD
Stranger: I’ve got the magic in me
You: Is it contagious?
Stranger: If you want it to be
You: It is contagious through the swapping of fluids…
Stranger: No it isn’t
You: Oh. Can we check to make sure?
Stranger: Yeash
You: Can you blame me for trying?
Stranger: No?
You: What do you look like?
Stranger: Like a woman
You: Refresh my memory. It’s been a while.
Stranger: I has blonde hurr
You: Me too.
Stranger: i noticed
You: Is that all you have? Hair? How old do you think I am?
Stranger: 64?
You: Close.
Stranger: 23?
You: 17.
Stranger: I was close!
You: Only out by a 1/3 of my age.
Stranger: Touche
You: No you’re a douche.
Stranger: I said touche. it’s french for ‘good point’
You: Touch

You: Hello.
Stranger: hi
You: From where are you?
Stranger: california
Stranger: u?
You: England.
Stranger: where in england
You: London. Where in California?
Stranger: san francisco
You: I have been there. Are you gay?
Stranger: no im bi
You: Are you male or inferior?
Stranger: whats inferior
You: It means “not as good”.
Stranger: so women are inferior?
You: Yes. Sorry.
Stranger: why
Stranger: i like women
Stranger: thats why i’m bi
You: So are you a woman? Women don’t do much.
Stranger: we keep the species alive by give birth to idiots like u
You: Men are also needed so we are even in that respect.
Stranger: naa not really
You: Really.
Stranger: science has progressed far enough
You: To grow babies in artificial wombs that don’t whinge.
Stranger: u r a whinge
You: And you are a silly little woman.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Male or inferior?
Stranger: Both
You: You are gay.
Stranger: You are ugly
You: Oh really? http://img263.imageshack.us/img263/7438/meagain2.jpg
Stranger: Eeewwwww!!!!
Stranger: Ur grossssssss!!
You: Thanks. ;)
Stranger: U make me wanna puke ur like a hippo
You: Is this better? http://img843.imageshack.us/img843/8744/epar.png
Stranger: Naww
You: Am I sexy?
Stranger: Nopee
You: Daddy says I’ll row up to be a beautiful women.
You: I mean grow.
Stranger: Ur a gurl!?!?! Ahahagagagaaaa u luk like a neither!!!
You: Of course I’m a girl, silly.
Stranger: Wow u just don’t get a hint do u… Ur uglyyyyyyyy
You: I’m not and you know it.
Stranger: Nope ur un attractive.
You: We both know that’s not true.
Stranger: I bet ur desperate. That’s y ur talking to me
You: I’m desperate for material. I’ve got a book to fill.
Stranger: Ahaha ur writing in a book about strangers that could be rapists???? I bet ur a rapist!!! :o
You: No. I’m writing a book about idiots.
Stranger: Bai tool face
You: You can write the foreword.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I was going to put all these in a book , but it would be a massive waste of paper.

You: Please don’t leave.
Stranger: Ok
You: Thanks.
Stranger: Why
Stranger: Wat for
You: I am lonely.
Stranger: Lol
You: Not funy.
Stranger: Asl?
Stranger: Sorry
You: 17. Male. England.
Stranger: Kl
Stranger: Why u lonely
You: I have no friends. ASL?
Stranger: 13 m uk
Stranger: U can make friends :)
You: Do you have a boyfriend, little guy?
Stranger: I’m straight, do you ??!!
You: Not yet. I used to think I was straight., then an older man turned me to homosexuality.
Stranger: Wtf
Stranger: Were u like raped?
You: No. I loved it. Where do you live in the UK?
Stranger: Bucks, u?
Stranger: Wat did he do and how old were you
You: I don’t like to talk about because it reminds me of what I don’t have now. I am from London. I can come over there if you want?
Stranger: No
Stranger: Wtf
Stranger: R u a peado
You: Maybe. You’d like me, though.
Stranger: Why
You: I am a sexy guy. http://img843.imageshack.us/img843/8744/epar.png
Stranger: WTF
Stranger: Why are u sayin this shit
Stranger: Brb
You: Come back soon, little one.
Stranger: K
You: Are you back yet?
Stranger: U look weird
You: Do you like me?
Stranger: No
You: You are just like everyone else.
Stranger: I feel physically sick tbh
You: I thought you were cool.
Stranger: Yeh mate, I’m normal
Stranger: Ur a peado
Stranger: Ur a freak
You: You shut the fuck up or I’l slit your throat and fuck your corpse.
Stranger: Freak
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Hello.
Stranger: heya
You: From where are you?
Stranger: manchesther u
You: London.
Stranger: r f or m
You: I’m a hot girl looking for sex in your area.
Stranger: who with wat gender
You: I’m actually a gay male.
Stranger: me too
You: That is sick.
Stranger: i no aint it u want virtual sex
You: No. I am afraid af virtual AIDS.
Stranger: hahah lol plz im ded horny
You: I’ve already cum, though.
Stranger: so have i but it is possible to do more plz im excited and want a bit more excited ive tried everythin ive been wankin 4 ages like hours
You: Here is a picture for you to wank over. http://img843.imageshack.us/img843/8744/epar.png
Stranger: thanks but i cant view it coz im on ma dsi also i want to wank ova u coz im really horny arent u
You: I am not horny for you.
Stranger: oh ok but can u be mate plz
You: I bum you. You like that, you bed bucket? Then we rub our dicks together and then I eat some of your faeces. Then my friend Rob joins in who is actually gay, despite what he says, and cums all over everything.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Male.
Stranger: female
You: How old r (are) u (you)?
Stranger: 17 and u? and its not like i wouldnt have known what u and r meant
You: I’m also 17. And where are you from, little girl?
Stranger: Little? I believe we are the same age little boy. and USA u?
You: England. What brings you to Omegle, old lady?
Stranger: I’m not old either! idk boredom
You: What colour (color) is your underwear? I am asking for purely scientific purposes.
Stranger: Sure you are!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Hey, sexy.
Stranger: Hi there.
Stranger: ASL?
You: 17. Male. England.
Stranger: What do you look like?
You: http://img263.imageshack.us/img263/7438/meagain2.jpg
Stranger: Describe yourself then. :)
You: That is me.
Stranger: Because I don’t share pics online for privacy reasons.
You: I’m not asking for any.
Stranger: So I’d prefer a good description.
You: Ugly.
Stranger: Aw, I wouldn’t say so!
Stranger: Here, I’ll check the pic for you.
Stranger: It’s not so bad.
You: Thanks.
You: What is your A, S and L?
Stranger: 23 f USA.
You: Why are you perving over teenage boys on Omegle?
Stranger: You started it.
Stranger: Besides, you wanted an opinion.
Stranger: You were hitting on me.
You: Are you impressed?
Stranger: Oh god, nobody can talk on Omegle without bringing sex up. Boring. I’ll find myself a woman to talk to instead.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I wasn

You: :)
Stranger: hi
Stranger: :P
You: Male.
Stranger: same
You: Gay?
Stranger: no
You: I’m fairly sure you are.
Stranger: y?
Stranger: just coz i dont next u?
You: Because I saw you having a bum with your boyfriend.
Stranger: u dont even know who i am
You: I know you’re gay, though.
Stranger: im not. i just got back from my girlfiends house
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: 17. Male. England.
Stranger: hey
You: Hello.
Stranger: 15 female
Stranger: NZ
Stranger: hi
You: That’s in Australia, isn’t it?
Stranger: haha no new zealand is near australia though
You: They are pretty much the same, I’m sorry to say.
Stranger: fuck you!
You: Calm down, dear.
Stranger: new zealand is way better
Stranger: haha im calm
You: Good. What brings you to Omegle, little girl?
Stranger: little girl?? um im bored
Stranger: im only 2 years younger than you
You: You’re still younger.
Stranger: you sound like your 30
Stranger: but oh how come your on omegle?
You: I’m looking for Australian girls.
Stranger: ohh.. well ill leave then
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Some deliberate mistakes in this one:
You: Am I a sey [not deliberate] girl? http://img263.imageshack.us/img263/7438/meagain2.jpg
Stranger: sinep
Stranger: thats what u are
You: You are a tnuc.
Stranger: I know
Stranger: :D
Stranger: I am the tilc master
You: What the fuck is a retsam?
Stranger: >_>
Stranger: If i could show u how im facpalmin rite now
You: What would you be wearing if you were at the beach?
Stranger: zZzZZZZI am a the beachzzZZZzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz
Stranger: and im wearin shorts
You: Niiiice.
Stranger: shes naked tho
You: That is sick.
Stranger: nope its not
You: Naked womans are icky.
Stranger: I get to look at a hot girl
Stranger: I guess ur gay then
You: That’s gay, man.
You: You’re gay.
Stranger: I just had sex dude
Stranger: with a chick
You: Sounds gay to me.
Stranger: okay
Stranger: whats not gay thenh
Stranger: I own a horse u know
You: Having sex with women is straight.
Stranger: u just said it was gay
You: No. I said you were gay.
Stranger: I just had sex dude
Stranger: how is that gay
Stranger: (well its gay if u had it with a dude but i didnt)
You: You seem to be talking about it a lot. Was it your first time?
Stranger: on the beach yes
You: Virgin.
Stranger: it was kinda uncomfortable tho
You: Is that so, faggot?
Stranger: yes she was
You: Five-year-olds tend to be.
Stranger: u jelly
You: You’re a gay paedophile.
Stranger: am i?
Stranger: I didnt know
You: Because you are ingorant.
Stranger: is bein INGORANT cool?
You: It’s spelled ignorant, you moron.
Stranger: o rly
Stranger: its spelt pedophile mormon
Stranger: bottom line
You: No, it’s definitely spelled “ignorant”.
Stranger: I got laid u didnt
Stranger: I know
You: Well done. I wish I had sex.
Stranger: i made an accent on what u mispelled
You: What did I spell wrong?
Stranger: with u being gay there’s a smaller chance for u to get laid
You: I only became gay to get a fuck.
Stranger: reread
You: Wait. You are gay, not me.
Stranger: well ur dad certainly made ur dream come true little man
You: Well if that’s so, then why are you?
Stranger: why am I
Stranger: ?
You: Yes.
Stranger: wtf does that mean?
You: Can’t you understand simple sentences? Even a lamb can read sentences. You’re such an idoit.
Stranger: actly a lamb cant read sentences especially when idiot is mispelled
You: I spelled it correctly.
Stranger: ok idoit is the rite way to spell it…?
You: No, you fool. It is spelled “idiot”.
Stranger: u wrote idoit u dumb fuck
You: No. I didn’t.
Stranger: stop being such a dumb fuck
Stranger: check again
You: “You’re such an idiot.” I spelled it correctly.
Stranger: “Can’t you understand simple sentences? Even a lamb can read sentences. You’re such an idoit.”
You: Anybody can change quotes.
Stranger: anybpody can look up and read what they just wrote
You: You can’t, apparently. I wrote “idiot”.
Stranger: anybody*
Stranger: lol u just wont except the fact that u wrote it wrong when its rite in front of u
You: So how old are you?
You: It is spelled correctly. Are you taking the piss?
Stranger: 22
Stranger: u
You: 17 years young.
Stranger: well it shows that younger ppl can be smarter than the elders
You: Yep. Do you like me?
Stranger: wait r 17 or 17 years older
You: I am 17.
You: Simple sentence…
Stranger: ok than i take back what I said before
Stranger: and change it to
You: “I am an idiot”?
Stranger: well it shows that older ppl can be smarter than the young ones
Stranger: ur too much fun to talk with
You: Thanks, love.
Stranger: ur simply denying the fact that u spelled something wrong
You: I spelled it right. Just admit you were wrong.
Stranger: 1)u spelled it wrong
Stranger: 2)I pointed it out
Stranger: 3)u corrected it and told me u were rite
Stranger: 4)denial
You: 8) -That’s you that is.
Stranger: ok nm
Stranger: i
You: am gay.
Stranger: r u b
Stranger: ritish
You: Yes.
Stranger: typical stupidity
You: It’s spelled “You are better than me.”
Stranger: okay
Stranger: I agree with u
Stranger: I am in fact better than u
Stranger: gotta ng
Stranger: o
You: What?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Hay.
Stranger: hi
You: What are you wearing?
Stranger: a towl
Stranger: u
You: Trousers and a shirt.
Stranger: i just got out of the shower
You: Were you dirty?
Stranger: lol
Stranger: my girlfriend just left
You: Nice. You’re a lesbian.
Stranger: i didn’t say that
You: You meant it, you filthy whore. Are you fingering yourself?
Stranger: 17/m
You: So you like roleplay? Do you like dressing up as a maid?
Stranger: u need help
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: 23 M. what do you like to talk about?
You: Sex.
Stranger: age?
You: 17.
Stranger: from?
You: England.
Stranger: gender?
You: Male.
Stranger: gay?
You: Are you calling me gay?
Stranger: no im asking you if you are gay
You: No, you’re gay.
Stranger: no im not..
You: I saw you with your boyfriend.
Stranger: you did.. shit… i saw you with your fathers best friend.. looks like you like old..
You: Is your name Gaylord Gay?
Stranger: nope… gaylord fucker….
You: That is also your favourite hobby.
Stranger: dont try to get me to like your hobbys… your hobbys are gay
You: Like you.
Stranger: no im not gay…
Stranger: but you are just like your hobbys..
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Yes.
Stranger: Aiden grimshaw
You: Gayden Grimgay.
Stranger: Do you know who he is?
You: He is gay, he is.
Stranger: So whats wrong If he is?
You: Gay people are gay.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: I am 12 inches. Do you want me?
Stranger: heyy
Stranger: i do want you (;
You: You must be gay, then.
Stranger: im male
You: Exactly.
Stranger: and im gay
You: You love men.
Stranger: yes i do
Stranger: so hot
Stranger: how old are you baby boy?
You: I’m actually five inches and 17.
Stranger: im 17 too and 6 inches
You: Do you like kids?
Stranger: there alright, dont mind them
You: I love them.
Stranger: thats good (:
Stranger: so can i fuck you?
You: OK. rugbyrob15@gmail.com
Stranger: do you want me to fuck you up the ass or do you want me to fuck you up the ass?
Stranger: you*
You: I want you to fuck me by e-mail. It feels more personal that way.
Stranger: i need a few details first my baby boy
You: http://img263.imageshack.us/img263/7438/meagain2.jpg Me.
Stranger: whats that of?
You: My face.
Stranger: your so hottt (;
You: You haven’t seen it, have you?
Stranger: no i did
You: So make sure you e-mail me, and remember: no matter how much I pretend not to be gay, I am just being a naughty boy.
Stranger: why would you pretend not to be gay..
You: It turns me on.
Stranger: thats kinda weird baby boy
You: I know. I am weird.
Stranger: thinking of you fucking me turns me on
You: Yes. It’s a lovely thought. Great.
Stranger: your so weird..
You: Yep.
Stranger: bye.
Stranger: to weird for me
You: Bye, sexy.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.