Question to discuss:
My scars remind me that is past is real………..
Stranger: Good
You: That’s nice.
Stranger: Why would you even write something like that?
You: I think he is gay.
Stranger: Or just a pretentious guy
Stranger: You know, the ones who type stuff like that on facebook
You: They’re gay as far as I’m concerned.
Stranger: Why do you hate gays?
You: I don’t hate gay. Why do you?
Stranger: I don’t! But you were saying something on the line of gay=stupid
Stranger: At least, that’s what i got
You: I use gay as an insult like calling someone a girl.
Stranger: Yeah, fair enough
Stranger: Didn’t they make a south park episode about something like that? I mean, calling people fags not because you’re homophobic but just as an insult
You: I don’t know. I’m not an encyclopedia.
Stranger: Maybe you knew the episode
You: I don’t know anything.
Stranger: Nobody know anything
Stranger: *knows
You: That’s deep.
Stranger: Nah, not really
You: Got a boyfriend?
Stranger: I’m a guy
Stranger: So no, not really
You: Why not? Are you straight or something?
Stranger: Yes i am
You: Hahaha. Straight-o. Why don’t you have sex with a woman, straightboy?
Stranger: Oww
Stranger: You hurt my feelings
You: Feelings? Straights don’t have feelings.
Stranger: You mean, like gingers?
You: What have you got against gingers? You’re mean.
Stranger: I’ve got nothing against gingers, i just use it as an insult.
Stranger: Actually that isn’t even true, but whatever
You: You shouldn’t because it’s offensive.
Stranger: You don’t say.
Stranger: I actually like red hair a lot
Stranger: I never got why red-haired people get so much hate
You: Because they are disgusting.
Stranger: You sound… bipolar?
You: No. I’m straight.
Stranger: Lol, you are so straight you don’t even know what bipolar means
You: It means I like male and female polar bears. I only like fucking the females, though.
Stranger: Yeah, fucking the males probably hurts
Stranger: a lot
You: And you would know, you big gay zoophile.
Stranger: Hey, don’t insult zoophiles, ok?
Stranger: They’re people like us
You: Don’t compare me to people.
Stranger: Also, you’re the one who has sex with polar bears
You: Only once.
Stranger: That’s… a good point actually
You: What are you wearing?
Stranger: Huh, clothes? It’s kinda cold, so i have a jumper on
Stranger: What are YOU wearing?
You: Pants and a dressing gown. From where are you?
Stranger: I guess you could guess.
Stranger: Not in the USA
You: Engaynd?
Stranger: I see what you did there
Stranger: But no
You: Gaynada?
Stranger: Nope.
You: Gaymany?
Stranger: Nein.
Stranger: But you’re closer
You: Yugayslavia?
Stranger: Nope, go west
You: Bellendgium?
Stranger: That’s too west and too north
Stranger: I’ll give you a hint
Stranger: In-a my spare time, I like to go rescuing-a princess! And i jump on-a strange monsters.
Stranger: And i have a bigga moustache
You: Are you sure it’s not Gaymany?
Stranger: I am
Stranger: Sure as pizza i am
You: Pizza – That’s Titaly.
Stranger: Yep.
Stranger: Titaly is actually a cool name. We should change it
Stranger: Where are you from, anyways?
You: England.
Stranger: Cool. Which part?
You: All of me.
Stranger: Don’t give me attitude, you pom
You: Youporn? What abou tit?
Stranger: I can’t make puns in english, that’s not fair.
Stranger: We should speak italian
You: Only muffs speak Titalian.
Stranger: I don’t even know what muff means. I mean, it’s not like we’re on the internet and i could look it up in like, three seconds
You: If you want to know what a muff is, look in a mirror.
Stranger: 1 a short tube made of fur or other warm material into which the hands are placed for warmth.
2 vulgar slang a woman’s genitals
Stranger: Last time i checked, i wasn’t neither a short tube or a vagina
You: You’re a vagina with a short tube.
Stranger: Or a short tube in a vagina
Stranger: which wouldn’t actually be that bad
You: You wish, virgin.
Stranger: I’ll be honest. There are worse fates than being stuck down there.
You: Homophobe.
Stranger: That doesn’t even make sense.
Stranger: Go back to drink tea.
You: I bet that would turn you on, wouldn’t it?
Stranger: Yes, i’m a teaphile
Stranger: If you were so kind to drink some tea with extra lemon, that would be an extra turn on
You: You are sick.
Stranger: You know what’s a good thing for when you’re sick? Tea.
You: Then you should have some tea, you paedophile.
Stranger: I already had.
Stranger: And what is a paedophile?
You: Someone who has sex with little kids, i.e. you.
Stranger: That would be a pedophile
You: If you spell it incorrectly, yes.
Stranger: If you wanted to really spell it correctly, then it should be Paidophilos
You: If I wanted to spell it correctly in a different language, that is.
Stranger: In a different language which is the one from where the english word came from
Stranger: Anyways, wikipedia (which, as we all know, is the most reliable source of information in the world) tells me you can spell it either way
You: Only paedophiles spell it without the “a”.
Stranger: I know, it would make more sense to spell it with the “a”
Stranger: But i’ve always seen americans spell it without the “a”, so i guess all the americans are paedophiles
You: That’s true.
Stranger: Whatever. You’re the english one.I guess what i learned here is that you shouldn’t argue about a foreign language with someone who actually speaks said language
You: You personally shouldn’t argue at all because you are always wrong.
Stranger: “Wrong” is relative.
Stranger: Therefore, you are wrong
You: You are Italian therefore you are wrong.
Stranger: You’re english, therefore your smugness makes you automatically wrong.
Stranger: And stop being so racist, or i will throw pizzas at you.
You: I’m only smug around people I’m better than, and that includes everyone from a different country.
Stranger: That’s pretty much the english stereotype. Do you also wear a monocle, by chance?
You: I wear a double monocle.
Stranger: Dear lord, you alone raise the level of britishness in the world by at least 23%
You: And the world is a better place for it.
Stranger: We could argue about that, but i don’t want to be thrown in the Tower of London
Stranger: That would be unfortunate
You: You wouldn’t go in there. We don’t like riff-raff in our towers.
Stranger: What are you going to do? Send me to India to harvest tea?
You: I’d just execute you if I had my way.
Stranger: Yeah, fair enough.
Stranger: We should fight sometimes
Stranger: And by “fight”, i mean duel
You: Aren’t you too old to be playing Yu-Gi-Oh?
Stranger: I don’t even know what Yu-Gi-Oh is, so i’ll just assume it’s some perverted english practice
You: It’s another word for sex. If a kid says they want to play Yu-Gi-Oh with you, they want to have sex with you so do it.
Stranger: I’m sorry, but nobody would be so retarded to use that euphemism outside of england.
Stranger: Dinner calls anyways. It’s a shame, this conversation was racistly interesting.
You: OK. Bye. Good luck with your legs.
Stranger: I actually didn’t get this one. I’m sure it’s some kind of paedophile or italian-related joke, so fuck you.
You: I was just hoping your legs are well in the future. No need to be rude about it.
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