Omegle

You: I am lonely.
Stranger: me too :/
You: From where are you?
Stranger: Minnesota,usa
You: That’s a shame.
Stranger: uh oh why/
Stranger: *?
You: If you lived near London there would be a slim but possible chance of sex.
Stranger: truee !
Stranger: so im guessing you are in the uk?
You: The US of K, as I believe you Americans call it.
Stranger: nahh we call it the unitedd kingdom or the uk or england haha
You: Oh right. How old are you?
Stranger: im 17
You: You are like a little very young foetus or something.
Stranger: wait what?
You: I’m saying you are young because it will be funny.
Stranger: eh okay, so im guessing you are a bit older?
You: I might be.
Stranger: im guessing you are in your 20s?
You: Guess again.
Stranger: 30s?
You: Not quite…
Stranger: eh 41?
You: It’s going to take ages for you to wrap round past infinity and come up through the negative numbers. I’m 17.
Stranger: youree 17? :P
You: “I’m 17.” I am 17 years old.
Stranger: thats unbelievable cause your sense of intelligence is rather high..
You: Capital letters and full stops (periods, to you) don’t make me intelligent. My IQ of 154 makes me intelligent.
Stranger: It’s not that, you can tell when someone is intelligent or not.
You: I can also tell if someone is intelligent.
You: OR NOT. Sorry, I forgot that part.
Stranger: it was a compliment saying you are intelligent, no need for your smart ass comments. (:
You: Sorry. What are you doing?
Stranger: im watching tv and getting annoyed that all they show is this stupid royal wedding, what about you?
You: Putting my banners up for the royal wedding.
Stranger: you have to put banners up?
You: No. I just like banners.
Stranger: what is it like there, doing this time?
You: I’m not too sure I follow you with that sentence. Do you mean during?
Stranger: yeah sorry..
You: A lot of the adverts are for royal wedding memorabilia/tat or advertising Freeview HD. At least we get the day off tomorrow.
Stranger: sounds like what its like here, minus getting the day off
You: Are you going to watch it at whatever time it is in your country?
Stranger: Well see, I’m not sure if I want to wake up at 4 in the morning. Are you planning on watching it?
You: I don’t want to, but I don’t want to jilt Kate.
Stranger: jilt?
You: Yep. What are your hobbies?
Stranger: texting, piano, violin, writing, and traveling. you?
You: Idiot’s piano, and playing Xbox.
Stranger: yeah, how long have you played?
You: Xbox or keyboards?
Stranger: keyboard..
You: About 6 years.
Stranger: Oh, I’m guessing you’re good.
You: Not really. I haven’t actually learned how to play properly.
Stranger: oh, why not?a
Stranger: *why not?
You: I’ve never really been interested in playing properly. For how long have you played piano?
Stranger: 12 years
You: Aren’t your hands sore by now?
Stranger: I’ve been through that part.
You: To where do you travel?
Stranger: We’ve been trying to travel throughout Europe
You: You and whom?
Stranger: My family.
You: Why have you only been trying?
Stranger: because my family is dysfunctional and my parents can never agree to disagree. So if one person likes this place we go there 50 times instead of trying other places
You: Go on two different holidays.
Stranger: They wouldn’t agree to do that. Cause my mom acts all stupid without my Dad around
You: Women, eh?
Stranger: You can say that.
You: That.
Stranger: Have you traveled anywhere?
You: Nope. I’m still in the hospital in which I was born. I have been to America and Malta and France and Mexico and that’s not all.
You: I’ve also been to Belgium.
Stranger: where in america?
You: Arizona and California mostly.
Stranger: which was your favorite?
You: My favourite was probably Arizona because I was younger and things get worse when one gets old, and I am very old so I should know.
Stranger: you aren’t old.
You: I may be only 17 years old, but I have lived for 6552 days. Think about that.
Stranger: In as much I would like to continue talking to you, I have to go pick up my mother from work. Havee a nice life, if we dont talk again
You: We are very unlikely to talk again, which is a shame because I think I love you. Bye-bye.
Stranger: yeah, it is a shame, do you have some type of network in which i would be able to contact you on again?
You: I have an e-mail address. Do you remember e-mail?
Stranger: i havee email too, whats yours?
You: lapearsall@googlemail.com
Stranger: btw whats your name?
You: L.A. Pearsall are my names, but you can call me boyfriend.
Stranger: haha iight, ill email youu. bye boyfriend !
You: Bye, boyfriend.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: 17. Male. England.
Stranger: 17 f beverly hills california
You: I have been there.
Stranger: hahah u like it?
You: It’s alright. Do you like Orpington?
Stranger: just alright?
You: Yes. I prefer Orpington.
Stranger: ohh and nah not really
Stranger: im jackie btw
You: I am Lydon, but if I had any friends they’d call me something funny
Stranger: u dont have friends?
You: Maybe one or two or one.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Good morning.
Stranger: good afternoon.
Stranger: know any good songs?
You: Noise In My Ears by Inpropaic.
Stranger: never heard it
Stranger: do you like Paramore?
You: No, but I like sausages.
Stranger: omnomnom
Stranger: I like soup.
You: All soup?
Stranger: most soup…
Stranger: I think. lol
You: Semen-flavoured soup?
Stranger: ew
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Hello.
Stranger: hi
Stranger: nice to meet u
You: From where are you?
Stranger: what?
Stranger: uk
Stranger: r u chinese?
You: No. Are you?
Stranger: where r u from?
You: England.
Stranger: ok
Stranger: do u know uk?
You: No. Where is it?
Stranger: r u british?
You: Yes.
Stranger: how come u dont know uk….
Stranger: r u indian…
You: I thought you were joking so I was playing along.
Stranger: haha
Stranger: ok
Stranger: good
Stranger: good one..
You: How old are you?
Stranger: 24
You: You are very old. You are like Methuselah from the Bible.
Stranger: thank u
Stranger: how old r u
Stranger: gender?
You: I am a little 17-year-old boy.
Stranger: ok
You: Are you male or inferior?
Stranger: f
[There was a delay long enough to look up the word inferior.]
Stranger: r u a bastard
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Good morning.
Stranger: were u from cus here it night
You: England.
Stranger: yes
You: Thanks for confirming my answer.
Stranger: were u from
Stranger: r u a girl
Stranger: women
You: Yes. I am an women.
Stranger: what ur nma
Stranger: name
You: Lydon.
Stranger: were u from
You: St Mary Cray.
Stranger: were at wat country
You: England.
Stranger: were about
You: St Mary Cray.
Stranger: were is that
You: England.
Stranger: kk
Stranger: wat do u like doing
Stranger: in ur spare time
You: I like playing Xbox.
Stranger: nd u r a girl
You: That’s a lie if you’re an idiot.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Male or inferior?
Stranger: hi
You: Hello.
Stranger: female
You: How old are you?
Stranger: 18
Stranger: you
You: 17 years young. From where are you, old lady?
Stranger: old lady? thanks
Stranger: from turkey you?
You: England. What are you wearing?
Stranger: t-shirt and jean
Stranger: why
You: I need to do something about my boner.
Stranger: your boner? what do you mean
You: I mean do you have a boyfriend?
Stranger: no we have just broken up
You: That’s sad. Why?
Stranger: he doesnt love me
You: The bastard. Did he just use you for sex?
Stranger: he used me for his ego
You: Men are pigs. Do you like sex?
Stranger: im virgin young boy :)
You: Not for long, if I have anything to do with it.
Stranger: why you are so corious about me virginity or what im wearing young boy?
You: Because I am a horny male, but I’m also writing a book.
Stranger: hey im elder than you so respect :)
You: I show to respect to all women.
You: Do you have any naked photos of yourself?
Stranger: no i havent
You: That’s a shame.
Stranger: sorry but im here for looking penpals
You: Penpals with benefits?
Stranger: I wanna improve my english im good at it but i just wanna talk with stranger
You: About what do you want to talk?
Stranger: i wanna talk about everything
Stranger: for instance
Stranger: about their culture food how they live about their school
You: I like sausages but you’re probably not allowed them. At school, I can talk to members of the opposite sex, but you’re probably not allowed to.
Stranger: we can eat sauseges and we can talk with boys :)
Stranger: but we dont eat pig meat
Stranger: its sin
You: Sausages don’t have to be pig, so I’ll give you that one. Is everyone who eats pig going to Hell?
Stranger: no but its sin we believe like that
Stranger: but i dont believe like that
You: Do you mean you don’t believe eating pig is a sin?
Stranger: yes i eat pig meat
You: Good girl.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: 17. Male. England.
Stranger: 15 female uk
You: What part?
Stranger: preston, you?
You: London. I actually meant what part of you is female.
Stranger: wtf?
Stranger: all of me?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: 17. Male. England.
Stranger: I am the oracel ask me anything and i will answer
You: How do you spell Oracle?
Stranger: oracle
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: 17. Male. England.
Stranger: u think that girls were born to suck cocks?
You: No, you fucking nonce. I would never get head from a baby.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: BOOO!!!
You: Aaaahhhh.
Stranger: FINALLLY!!!
Stranger: SOMEONE IS AFRAID OF MEE
Stranger: My goodness
Stranger: You’re my hero!
You: What do you look like so I know of whom to be afraid?
Stranger: Well, my name is Jamie
Stranger: Don’t let the name fool you though
Stranger: I’m a dude
You: You’re a dud, more like.
Stranger: and I’m probably the splitting image of James Bond
Stranger: now now, don’t get nasty
Stranger: we just met
You: I like it nasty.
Stranger: Good for you
Stranger: At least you’re getting some
You: Not until I speak to Alicia Booth.
Stranger: Who’s Alicia Booth?
You: She will be my girlfriend.
Stranger: oohhhhhh
Stranger: your crushhh
You: I’m not even fat and if I was, she could go on top.
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: Let the girl do all the work eh?
Stranger: while you just lie there
You: That’s my plan.
Stranger: that’s generous of you
Stranger: so what’s your name dude?
You: Lydon.
Stranger: Nice to meet you Lydon
Stranger: Where are you from?
You: From England I am.
Stranger: ahhh
Stranger: England
Stranger: God Save the Queen
You: The fascist regime?
Stranger: yeap
Stranger: For one, you’re named after Jonny Rotten
You: I am impressed.
Stranger: Thank You
Stranger: Punk Rock \m/
You: What?
Stranger: nothingg
Stranger: How old are ya?
You: I am 17 years young. How old are yi?
Stranger: I’m 18 this sept
Stranger: so 17 years young too
Stranger: From Singapore i am
Stranger: you guys used to own this land
You: And now look at it.
Stranger: It’s more cleaner and advanced than you guys can ever do
Stranger: so yay us
You: I see your country drives on the left.
Stranger: Yeah
Stranger: The Steering wheel is on the right side
Stranger: like you guys
Stranger: not the wrong side
Stranger: like the french
You: Are you gay?
Stranger: nope
You: Please.
Stranger: I’m insulted dude
Stranger: Thinking I’m gay
Stranger: Fuckk man
Stranger: Do I seem gay?
You: A little.
Stranger: shit
Stranger: no wonder I can’t get the ladies
You: You are such a loser.
Stranger: Speak for yourself
You: I am.
Stranger: You’re a loser too?
Stranger: Such a lsoer you can’t get Alicia Booth?
You: I need to speak to her first.
Stranger: So you haven’t even tried
Stranger: What’s the matter?
Stranger: Cat got your balls?
You: Who are you, the honey monster? I get scared.
Stranger: It’s much better than starting out with asl
Stranger: asl fucking SUCKS
Stranger: Whatever happened to getting to know those information through the art of conversation
You: In a real world conversation, they would all be fairly obvious. It sets a decent pretext for the conversation.
Stranger: True
Stranger: Except they’ll disconnect you if you don’t suit them
Stranger: they don’t even bother trying
Stranger: all those wankers are just out to talk to girls
You: I was hoping you were a girl, actually.
Stranger: Close enough innit?
Stranger: Since you thought you were gay
Stranger: I was gay**
Stranger: sorry
You: I can tell the difference between a woman’s vagia and a man’s arse, so no, it’s not close enough.
Stranger: haha
Stranger: touche
You: No you’re a douche.
Stranger: thanks
Stranger: I try my best
Stranger: what brings you to this God’forsaken site anyway?
You: Looking for pussy.
Stranger: You do know this is text based yeah?
Stranger: you wouldn’t be able to see some
Stranger: Why not go don’t to your local pub
Stranger: you’ll get better luck there
Stranger: down*
You: I am scared of the sort of people who frequent pubs.
Stranger: Wow
Stranger: So you resort to omegle instead
Stranger: isn’t it pathetic?
You: No. I had cybersex with a 13-year-old once but it turned out to be a man but it was still fun while it lasted.
Stranger: Ignorance is bliss?
Stranger: and you go for 13-year-olds?
Stranger: Sexual predators in the making?
You: If they are there for the taking, yes.
Stranger: right
Stranger: I might be a douche
Stranger: but you’re a creep
You: They look and feel the same.
Stranger: who?
You: 13-year-olds and older ladies.
Stranger: speaking from experience?
You: I wish.
Stranger: so you’re just making an assumption?
You: Yes.
Stranger: Awesome
Stranger: Good luck with Alicia Booth
Stranger: and Your life
You: Thank you.
Stranger: i’m sure you guys will make a lovely couple
Stranger: Cheers!
You: Good luck with your legs.
Stranger: legs?
You: Sorry. Do you not have legs?
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: but it’s a strange thing to wish good luck to
You: I thought it was normal.
Stranger: anyway
Stranger: Good luck with your life
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Alicia Booth said no, the slag.

Stranger: hiya
You: I am male too.
Stranger: and im female
You: Human?
Stranger: obvs
You: From where are you?
Stranger: england you freak
You: Why am I freak?
Stranger: coz u ask werid questions
You: I’m only asking “ASL” the long way.
Stranger: okeyy then were u from?
You: England.
Stranger: were bouts in england?
You: London. You?
Stranger: essex
Stranger: you girl or boy?
You: Are you actually retarded?
Stranger: pfft no
You: Read what you’ve already acknowledged. How old are you?
Stranger: ohh yh lmao!! and im 14 why? im just abit dumb lool
You: Got a boyfriend, little girl?
Stranger: lool and yh..how old are you??
You: I’m 17 years young.
Stranger: cool
Stranger: you got a girlfriend/
You: Not yet. I will have one by the end of this conversation, though.
Stranger: looool
You: What are you wearing?
Stranger: my p.j’s scening it is 11:05
You: You should be asleep.
Stranger: so should you
You: I’m a big boy. I go to bed when I please. I wouldn’t mind going to bed if you were here with me, though.
Stranger: i can go to bed wen i want aswell.its called being a teenager lool and your trying to be nice buts its not really wokring out for ya
You: Would you prefer I played the bad boy, you filthy whore?
Stranger: no thats just makes me laugh
You: What do you girls want?
Stranger: a normal boy who they can trust and make them happy and be themselves
You: None of those things apply to me. Would you at least be up for a fuck?
Stranger: ahha yh why not
You: Because I’m an ugly freak? That’s the usual reason nobody has sex with me.
Stranger: lool i bet ur not even ugly
You: http://img64.imageshack.us/img64/904/dreamboat.jpg I am.
Stranger: you look american :S
You: Are you calling me fat?
Stranger: no lool not all americans are fat
You: What do you look like?
Stranger: look me up on facebook faith read
You: http://www.facebook.com/people/Faith-Read/100002040941533 You look older than 14.
Stranger: thats not me :O ahha
You: Shut that mouth or I’ll shove my cock in it. I can’t find you.
Stranger: lool
Stranger: http://www.facebook.com/fread2
You: Do I need a Facebook profile to see it? I effectively don’t have a Facebook profile.
Stranger: im the first one that comes up
You: The first one that comes up for me has no picture. It just looks like a bedknob. However, without seeing you, I’m sure I’d fuck you.
Stranger: bedknob??
You: What about it?
Stranger: wat is it?
You: A knob atop the vertical parts of a bed. It’s nothing dirty like you thought.
Stranger: ohh aha i get ya
You: What sort of things do you do with your boyfriend?
Stranger: the usual stuff tbh
You: Spare no details.
Stranger: lool well wat do u think we do?
You: Do you two play Othello together?
Stranger: wats that? lool
You: It’s a game similar or identical to Go! A minute to learn, a lifetime to master.
Stranger: ohh no never herd of it
You: I’m not surprised. Have you ever lezzed it up with anyone?
Stranger: noo im completly straight
You: For the purposes of my wank, can you say you are a lesbian?
Stranger: ahha yh
You: Have you ever been in a threesome?
Stranger: noo wbu?
You: I’m the sort of person who gets off talking to fourteen-year-olds on Omegle. What do you think?
Stranger: fucked up in the head
You: I wouldn’t go that far.
Stranger: i would its weird nd u need to get a life
You: I’ll start by taking yours.
Stranger: u wished
You: I don’t actually want to kill you.
Stranger: thought so
You: How big are your tits?
Stranger: bid enought thnx.
You: Is that a bra size, “big enough”?
Stranger: no
Stranger: obvs not..never been shopping before
You: What is your best fetish?
Stranger: dont have ine tbh
Stranger: *one
You: You must have.
Stranger: nope
You: That’s a shame.
Stranger: lool
You: What are your hobbies?
Stranger: your really weird and ask alot f personal questions..i recomend that u grow up act ur age,have a hair cut,and get a job. k. thnx. bye.
You: So I can ask you about your tits, and that’s fine, but your hobbies are off limits?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Are you a sexy male?
Stranger: yeh
You: Me too.
Stranger: are you girl?
You: Yes, yes I am.
Stranger: ohhhhhh
Stranger: how old are you?
You: 17 years young.
Stranger: have you got skype
Stranger: ?
You: No; I recently had an STD check.
Stranger: do you want me?
You: Not particularly. You seem a little thick.
Stranger: really?
You: Yes.
Stranger: i want you
You: My men have to have a knowledge of simple two word phrases.
Stranger: i want to fuck you
You: Are you gay?
Stranger: nooooooooo
You: You definitely are.
Stranger: are you girl?
You: Can you read the first three lines of this conversation for me please?
Stranger: oh sorry
Stranger: pussy
You: No. I have a penis.
Stranger: what?
You: Surely you’ve seen enough of them to know what one is?
Stranger: what is your name?
You: Lydon Pearsall.
Stranger: i want to fuck you
Stranger: do you want?
You: You’re definitely a wind-up merchant.
Stranger: fuck your mother
You: No thanks.
Stranger: i want to see you/…
You: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:HappyShopper.jpg This is me.
You: Sorry, that’s the Happy Shopper logo. This is me: http://img64.imageshack.us/img64/904/dreamboat.jpg
Stranger: where may i write it
Stranger: ?
You: In a journal or on the inside of a cereal box, maybe?
Stranger: have you got facebook?
You: Not one I’d share with the likes of you.
Stranger: one minut please
Stranger: are you beautifull
Stranger: ?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: Heyy :) male 22,wanna talk to a hott girl :))
You: That’s me.
You: Sorry, I thought you said Lydon.
Stranger: where are you from
You: I am a boy. I thought you said my name.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: 17. Male. England.
Stranger: hy
Stranger: uff.
You: Hello.
Stranger: everybodys so fast.
Stranger: 15, female, germany.
You: Guten Abends.
Stranger: Hallo! :D
Stranger: Kannst du deutsch nur ein bisschen, oder gut?
You: Ja.
Stranger: Ja?
Stranger: Cute.
You: Ich kenne Deutsch.
Stranger: My heart is already yours.
You: Is your body mine too?
Stranger: never.
You: I tried.
Stranger: now, my heart is not yours anymore.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: 5. Male. England.
Stranger: 5?
You: Yes. Got a problem with that?
Stranger: yeah. namely, i’m not a rapist. so
You: So what? I’d probably consent.
Stranger: so it’d be consensual rape. that’s still jailtime
You: Why would it be rape?
Stranger: because you are five and i am an adult. if i boned you, it’d be unright.
You: Is it against the law to have sex with someone with a small penis?
Stranger: when it’s a five year old, yes.
You: I think you misunderstand. I’m 5 inches.
Stranger: oh, i see. well i definitely understand now.
Stranger: ;)
You: Are you gay?
Stranger: i’m a straight girl.
You: How old are you?
Stranger: 36
You: You are more a woman than a girl.
Stranger: okay dick. i still got the tits and the pussy.
You: I’m not complaining.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: I am a gay potatoes.
Stranger: i am a gay carrot!
You: What?
Stranger: i know right
You: You seem interesting. Do you want to have sex with me?
Stranger: well im not a gay potato, this could be difficult
You: I’m not really a gay potatoes.
Stranger: oh wow, you dodged a bullet there man, its not fun
Stranger: however, are you a wizard>
You: I’m not/
Stranger: oh ok
Stranger: are you a dude or what
You: I may not be a wizard, but I sure can jizz hard. Does that answer your question?
Stranger: jizz in your pants or in the air like you just don;t care/
You: On my stomach.
Stranger: oh gross. i find that its quite a forceful orgasm and so i get it on my face
You: What are you wearing?
Stranger: im wearing a strap on that;s not fake
Stranger: in other words im a dude
Stranger: and a troll
You: Are you trolling now?
Stranger: what do you do when confronted by a troll?
You: Get a bigger goat.
Stranger: ok, in all seriousness. can i ask you something?
You: No.
Stranger: Fucking magnets dude…how do they work?
You: The power of Christ compels them.
Stranger: so jesus is a wizard?
You: Wizards and Jesus are made-up.
Stranger: ok, im outta here. gotta go fuck my hand
You: Bye.
Stranger: have a good one
Stranger: walk with the earthmother
You: Blessing of Akatosh upon ye.
Stranger: may the eternal sun shine upon you
You: Piss off, then.
Stranger: :)
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You:
I don’t want to sounds like a weirdo or anything, but can I fist your arsehole until I can see your intestines and my hand is covered in shit while you piss on me?
Stranger: have you seen catfish?
You: Yes.
Stranger: what a film hey
You: I have not seen a film by that name.
Stranger: oh………..
Stranger: why did you lie then?
You: From where I come, we start titles with capital letters.
Stranger: Touch

You: 5. Male. England.
Stranger: D
Stranger: 5?
You: Yes.
Stranger: You are lying
You: No. I’m sitting down.
Stranger: Children should be at schhol
now
You: At 4:30 in the afternoon?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hey
You: Will you be my girlfriend?
Stranger: no
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Hello.
Stranger: heyy
You: I am male.
Stranger: cool
Stranger: f 19 usa
You: What brings you to Omegle?
Stranger: bored wbu?
You: I am conducting a subliminal advertising campaign.
Stranger: your advertizing something?
You: No. I’m advertising something.
Stranger: well well mr sarcasm
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hey
You: I am gay.
Stranger: wow
Stranger: awesome
You: Are you gay?
Stranger: No
Stranger: I am f
You: You may as well be gay.
Stranger: uh?
You: I see. So from where are you?
Stranger: I’m from Espana
You: Is that near Spain?
Stranger: right
You: How old are you?
Stranger: 19 years old
Stranger: you?
You: I am just 17.
Stranger: where r u from?
You: England.
Stranger: umm..
Stranger: do you like football?
You: GOOOAAAL! No.
Stranger: what is your favorite sport?
You: Does Monopoly count as a sport?
Stranger: oh
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Can we have sex?
Stranger: AIDEN GRIMSHAW
You: Gayden Gaywhore, more like.
Stranger: Pfffft.
You: Yes, he is a poof.
Stranger: And you are a shitbag.
You: Why do you say so?
Stranger: Just cause of the shit you just said..
You: You are a mean person.
Stranger: So are you :O
You: So, do you want to have sex with me?
Stranger: NO!
You: Why not?
Stranger: You are a poof ;)
You: True.
Stranger: Thats why.
You: Are you gay?
Stranger: Noooo?
You: Yes you are.
Stranger: No I’m not. I like Aiden!
Stranger: We has sex ;)
Stranger: *had
You: So you must be a gay, then.
Stranger: Eh I’m a female. Idiot
You: A female. I apologise for everyone bad I’ve said to you. What do you look like?
Stranger: You’re not forgiven.
You: Please forgive me. You should spank me so I learn my lesson.
Stranger: I’d rather spank AIDENS ass, if it’s all the same to you :)
You: I look like him and can sing like him.
Stranger: Pffft. Then you called yourself gay?!
You: I called him gay before I knew who he was.
Stranger: So you dont even know who he is?
You: I do now.
Stranger: & he’s not gay, right?
You: He might be.
Stranger: HE’S NOT
You: Got any proof?
Stranger: HE HAS HAD GIRLFRIENDS!
You: Who all look like men.
Stranger: Are you having a laugh?!
You: I’m a wind-up merchant.
Stranger: Thought as much.
You: How old are you?
Stranger: 16
You: I can barely remember when I was 16. It seems like so long ago.
Stranger: How old are you?!
You: 17.
Stranger: No you’re not.
You: Yes I am, little girl.
Stranger: Fuck you
You: Sorry, love.
Stranger: Meh.
You: From where are you?
Stranger: Why should I tell a creep like you?
You: I’m not a creep.
Stranger: CREEP
You: I don’t look creepy. http://img64.imageshack.us/img64/904/dreamboat.jpg
Stranger: YOU’RE A CREEP! YOU’RE A WEIRDO! WHAT THR HE’LL ARE YOU DOING HERE?!
Stranger: *the hell
You: Why are you so angry? Are you on your period?
Stranger: Pahaha.
You: So where do you live?
Stranger: Twitter
You: Do you live in air?
Stranger: TWITTER DOESNT HAVE AIR
You: Calm down, young lady.
Stranger: FUCK YOU
You: I am sorry for whatever I have done to offend you.
Stranger: YOU CALLED AIDEN A POOF. That’s enough to offend me.
You: He is as straight as an arrow. Now can you tell me your address please?
Stranger: Why you want to know my address so bad? STALKER.
You: There is a difference between a stalker and a rapist.
Stranger: RAPIST! :O
You: Shut that mouth or I’ll shove my cock in it.
Stranger: You have a problem. SHUT THE FUCK UP
You: You love the attention.
Stranger: Attention from rapist? Yeah right…
Stranger: *a
You: I’m not even a rapist. When we have sex it will be concensual.
Stranger: I bet you are. And what?
You: And I’ll kiss your neck passionately and gently rub your nipples.
Stranger: Fuck offfffff. GET A LIFE
You: I’ll take yours, thanks.
Stranger: FUCKING CREEP
You: I’ve apologised for calling your boyfriend gay, so why are you still angry at me?
Stranger: You are a rapist & want to take my life.
You: Oh yeah.
Stranger: BYE!
You: Please don’t go. I am very lonely.
Stranger: LOL
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hey
You: Hello. Please love me.
Stranger: okay
Stranger: hugging the stranger :D
You: I’m sorry. This doesn’t normally happen.
You: Can we forget about this and start again?
Stranger: yeah :D
You: I’m all sticky now. What is your A., S. and L.?
Stranger: my A ist 15, my S female and my L germany and whats about ur A S ‘nd L?
You: I am 17 and male from England, but no hard feelings about the war…
You: that we won.
Stranger: :D
Stranger: which war?
You: The main two. What brings you to Omegle, young lady?
Stranger: I dont know … meebo is bad so I searched a new website :D
Stranger: and whats about u?
You: I am conducting a subliminal advertising campaign.
Stranger: are u kidding me?
You: Yes.
Stranger: haha :D
You: Do you have a boyfriend?
Stranger: no
Stranger: and u … a boyfriend *g*
You: Yes. I have a boyfriend because I am very gay.
Stranger: oh yeah :D
Stranger: I have dinner now so bye
You: Bye, sexy.
Stranger: or u waiting a half our xD
Stranger: hou*
Stranger: hour*
You: I could wait.
Stranger: okay
Stranger: r u there?
You: No.
Stranger: oh … such a sad thing
You: I’m back now, though. What did you have for dinner?
Stranger: bread and other boring things
You: You can’t have bread for dinner.
Stranger: why not?
You: It’s not much. What did you have with it?
Stranger: meat or cheese
You: Was it a sandwich?
Stranger: kinda
You: What is your favourite food?
Stranger: well pineapple
Stranger: i know its just a fruit
You: I like mangos.
Stranger: mangos r yummy
You: Like you.
Stranger: thx
You: What do you want to be as your job?
Stranger: friut salat is the best thing of life
Stranger: soldier
You: I don’t believe you.
Stranger: really! My mum is going to kill me xD
Stranger: but y not?
You: Why do you want to be a soldier?
Stranger: I dont know… its strange but I want to be one
You: Do you want to kill people?
Stranger: not really but someone ould do it
Stranger: would*
You: What are your hobbies?
Stranger: hockey :D sport, sport, sport and ur?
You: Anything but sport. I used to play hockey, though.
Stranger: really thats great :D
Stranger: field hockey is so … I cant discribe it
You: It’s alright.
Stranger: haha :) lol
You: For how long have you been learning English?
Stranger: 1, 2, 3 … 5 years I think and I’m still bad xD
You: I agree.
Stranger: … o.o … meeeep
You: u r good at english
Stranger: haha :)
Stranger: thank u
Stranger: but my mark last year was a 5 the worsest is a 6
Stranger: haha
You: I have understood everything you have said apart from this “lol” word.
Stranger: wow … thats … well … I dont know
You: What is your favourite subject?
Stranger: biologie
Stranger: and ur?
You: I only do maths and engineering. I prefer engineering.
Stranger: we dont have engineering
Stranger: art is nice too
You: Do you like painting?
Stranger: yes
Stranger: and u?
You: I’m no good at painting so no.
Stranger: but it is fun
You: I prefer computer based drawing.
Stranger: im to stupid for that … lol
You: I’m sure you’re not. What are you wearing?
Stranger: why r u asking me that kind of question?
You: Because I am a lonely freak.
Stranger: oh … whats ur name?
You: Lydon. What is yours?
Stranger: annika
Stranger: Lydon is like London :D
You: Annika is like Vinegar. When I was about 4, I went to America and the kids there called me London.
Stranger: oh dear u have a trauma :D
You: Have you any vinegar-related traumas?
Stranger: no, not yet
You: Are you expecting some?
Stranger: i really dont know
You: What music do you like?
Stranger: everything :D I know thats strange
You: Even electronic?
Stranger: sometimes, yeah
You: What is one of your favourite songs?
Stranger: sorry my internet is crashing down ._.
Stranger: bye
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Hello, young man.
Stranger: hi
You: From where are you?
Stranger: usa and im 20
You: What are you wearing?
Stranger: jeans and shirt
You: Very sexy.
Stranger: lol
You: What?
Stranger: idk
You: What part os the USA?
Stranger: georgia
You: That is a country in Europe. I thought you said you were American?
Stranger: yeah im from Georgia the state in the USA
Stranger: its in southern US
You: Georgia is a girl’s name, not a state.
Stranger: it was named after King George of ENgland take it up with him
You: Calm down, love.
Stranger: lol :P
You: Do you want to meet up for sex one day?
Stranger: how?
You: It would have to be anally.
Stranger: ok, im lost
You: You’re in Georgia.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hey
You: Bye.
Stranger: hahahahaha
Stranger: bye
Your conversational partner has disconnected.